Been a while

Took a break from posting as I needed to recenter. It's been a hot minute thanks to life and generally having my shelf finally shatter from all the falsity being piled on it. I walked away from the church the day I was told it was better to be homeless than to move in with my fiance and his mother.

That was the day I decided fuck this, I'm living my life. But that's not good for the church. It's very very bad as any member who leaves is not only cash lost, but someone who has insider info that can make the church look bad.

So now they are stalking me.... Lovely.

From the lips of babes

http://www.esquire.com/news-politics/a45719/gay-mormon-community/

Economic Abuse

This was my exhusband when we were married. I was constantly told I was selfish for spending funds on things such as my life saving medications and femenine essentials. He kept such a tight leash on the money that when we split, I had exactly 32 bucks in my checking account. Come to find out, he was blowing money on the stock market off credit cards while I was sleeping and using MY paychecks to pay them off in secret out of our joint checking account that I had no access to.

This came about because our temple marriage prep class actually ENCOURAGED the men to take control of ALL household funds and dole out money to the wives to pay the bills and get the household things. It TOLD the husbands to handle all the funds and not "worry" the wives with the troubles of dealing with the banks as it could be too stressful for us while working towards having children.

I have a vice grip on my money now and refuse to allow my fiance access, he has his account, I have mine and never shall the two meet. We each take a few bills and pay them ourselves while telling the other when we need help to make a payment or to get something. Generally, if one doesn't have the money, the other does.


economic abuse

Marriage Rights: Voting For the Obvious

Marriage Rights: Voting For the Obvious

            Just this year, SCOTUS has had many a case brought before it that can be deemed controversial. Gay Marriage Rights was finally ruled upon in a case called Obergefell v. Hodges. This was tied to five other cases of similar style calling for the Court to decide if homosexuals had the right to marry in the eyes of the law. The Court ruled that marriage is a right for all consenting adults be they homosexual or heterosexual (576 U.S. ___). This has caused a backlash all over the country from people who think that such actions are illegal and in their opinions against "God's Laws".

            Obergefell v. Hodges was years in the making, it started with DeBoer v Snyder (576 U.S. ___). This was a Michigan case that was filled in  2012 due to the couple being black balled from sharing parenthood of their son because they weren't in a legally recognized marriage (772 F.3d 388). Deboer's case was focused on the state's adoption laws but was refocused towards the marriage law as that was the true thing holding the couple back (772 F.3d 388).  This worked and the couple went on to sue the state claiming that anti-gay marriage laws were against the United States Constitution(772 F.3d 388). This snow balled into 5 cases making the equivalent of a class action law suit against the Fed under the claim that anti gay marriage laws violated people's rights under the Constitution. Obergefell came a year after in 2013 when one half of a gay marriage died and the other half requested that he be placed on the death certificate as his husband and surviving spouse (576 U.S. ___).

            The five cases were combined under the title Obergefell v. Hodges (576 U.S. ___). The claim was that the laws in each state violated the claimants 14th Amendment rights to Due Process and Equal Protection (576 U.S. ___). The court agreed with the petitioners and ruled that the Fed and states must recognize and issue same sex marriage licenses or violate the inherent spirit of the 14th Amendment. SCOTUS has a heavy burden each year while they are in session to analyze each case presented carefully and weigh the cost of agreeing with the petitioner or tossing the case out for precedent (576 U.S. ___).

            Over the past couple of years cases have been brought before the Supreme Court that have systematically destroyed all legal argument for denying two consenting adults under the spirit and heart of the United States Constitution. Obergefell and the various petitioners have been given the same rights as those in heterosexual relationships (576 U.S. ___). The Constitution cannot be taken literally or else laws on marriage wouldn't be allowed in the first place as the lack of writing upon them would create a void in the government. The Constitution has to be taken in the spirit it was written instead.

            The 14th Amendment states: " Section 1. All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the state wherein they reside. No state shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any state deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws." (Cornell University Law School). The spirit of the law in this passage is how cases such as "Brown v. Board of Education" those cases were looked at not in the letter of the 14th Amendment, but in the spirit of the Amendment it guarantees each child, regardless of ethnicity or gender, an education that is the same as everyone else. There is no logical reason that marriage rights shouldn't fall under the same thought process as education. Before this case was put before the Supreme Court, the law couldn't legally tell two heterosexual adults they couldn't get married because of the color of their skin, that was ruled unconstitutional years before, gender is no different. In this case I agree with the majority that to deny homosexual couples the same right that their heterosexual counter parts enjoy each day is turning our back on the keystone of social order that marriage is in our country. I also agree with the majority that the idea of same sex marriage harming the marriages of straight couples is ridiculous and that no lasting harm can happen to any current or future heterosexual marriage by allowing same sex couples to marry (576 U.S. ___).

            Marriage is a fundamental right promised in the Constitution by its promise of the right to freedom and happiness for every person in this nation. By denying gay couples because of a small group's ideal of moral propriety is to thumb our noses at the spirit that was engrained into the very parchment our founding fathers wrote it on. By denying a portion of our nation the same rights that a majority of the nation gets is turning our backs on the basis of our society that all men are equal.

Resources

Cornell University Law School. (n.d.). 14th Amendment. Retrieved September 19, 2015, from https://www.law.cornell.edu/constitution/amendmentxiv

DeBoer v. Snyder, 772 F.3d 388 (6th Cir. 2014)

Obergefell v. Hodges 576 U.S. ___ (2015)

I Am

I am loud, I am brash, I speak directly and don't believe in beating around the bush. I don't sugar coat things that don't need to be. 

I am an unrepentant liberal/socialist. I believe that it's no one's business, but my own what I do with my body and the same for everyone else.

 I think the rich are too rich and the poor are too poor, that there needs to be a redistribution of wage and money. 

I think that the rich need to be taxed at a HUGE percentage and ALL that money needs to be spent on those who need it most, with absolutely NO tax breaks for the rich or businesses. 

I think rapists need to be treated like terrorists and that the focus of all crimes in the news should be on the victims and their families NOT the people who commit the crime.

I think Muslims are awesome people with a bad rep and that conservatism is the greatest threat to this country and freedom. 

I believe that marriage is between consenting adults gender need not matter. I will NEVER back down from defending what I believe. 

I will post what I want about my beliefs and I will never remove them. I welcome open peaceful dialogue and enjoy debate. 

I will NOT tolerate hate speech nor will I allow comments that serve nothing but to inflame those around the post.

Sad day...

So today is a sad day for me. Not for a personal reason, but because I realized how sad many people I consider to be my friends really are. A friend of mine got married to a guy after dating him for 5 months. They were only married for a couple of years before she moved back home and started divorce proceedings. To cap it off, she is already dating another guy, her divorce isn't final I might add, saying this one is the love of her life and how happy they are and how he is the greatest thing to ever happen to her... This saddens me because it's a glaring example of how people my age rush into marriage, and when things get bumpy, rather than fix things or work on them, they just throw it away and run back home to mummy and daddy. They go from claiming to have the perfect marriage to trying to smear campaign each other into humiliation and it greatly depresses me because they chose to leap into a marriage and yet don't have the maturity to fight for it when real life proves to be difficult to make it as adults with out the parents to pay for everything or give them money when ever they ask.

This particular girl has already moved back home, into her old room, gotten mummy and daddy to buy all new stuff for her to decorate with and has begun to "Flaunt" her new life for all to see. She acts as though it all never happened and that her life is once again perfect and untouched. She has gotten her parents to do more now for her then before she had been married and it's just a sad realization that marriage is dying because people have an overly romanticized view of what marriage is going to be like.

Marriage is hard work, no matter how strong you think your relationship is, once living together, paying bills and no longer having much in the way of private time exists, things become hard work. You have to work a lot to make things smooth and always be willing to discuss things and work them out.

They have a saying to never go to bed angry, but in reality, going to bed upset can help things come morning. Once both people have slept and have had a chance to calm down, it's easier to talk things out with out having ruffled and puffed out feathers to pick at.